hello, beautiful ♥
Straight White Boy Problem #489

straightwhiteboyproblems:

tellin everybody on a friday you are gonna get ‘so drunk tonight’ but none of your friends are having parties so when u go back to school on Monday and people ask about your weekend you have to think of an elaborate excuse in order to stay credible and cool

Anonymous said: heterosexual caucasian male issues

straightwhiteboyproblems:

this is just another example of a social justice blogger trying to make a jab at me I do not appreciate this! Please just let me watch football in peace thank you

Straight White Boy Problem #490

straightwhiteboyproblems:

*walks into thrift store* hey do u have any Hawaiian shirts I can’t find any here. Friday is hawaiian shirt day and i really need a hawaiian shirt or all of my friends are going to make fun of me. I’ve looked through all of your clothes and i

Straight White Boy Problem #491

straightwhiteboyproblems:

Adrian Peterson AND Ray Rice were BOTH on my fantasy team *MEME RAGE FACE* FUUCUUUUUUUUUU

Straight White Boy Problem #492

straightwhiteboyproblems:

*sees friend near the end of the lunch line getting french fries* dude!!! *runs up to friend and gives him a high five* what’s up man?? what’s for lunch today?? Buffalo wings?? Aw man that sounds so good I’m just going to squeeze in right here because I know you were saving me this spot the whole…

Straight White Boy Problem #493

straightwhiteboyproblems:

tried to post a snapchat video of me blowing smoke into the camera but my finger slipped off the button and it only got 3 seconds of me inhaling

Straight White Boy Problem #494

straightwhiteboyproblems:

*me chillin in the living room waitin for Monday Night Football* adrian Peterson is goin to get suspended for whipping his kid with a stick and serves him right. kids don’t deserve that type of punishment if they can’t defend themselves *dad comes back from work, says “I hope you got all of your…

Straight White Boy Problem #495

straightwhiteboyproblems:

*texting girl for a good twenty min*  *no reply for five min*  *panics and checks her snapchat count and it’s rising*  *starts thinkin about how i really screwed up in that last text* now im not hungry for dinner

Straight White Boy Problem #495

straightwhiteboyproblems:

gallantgoat2:

straightwhiteboyproblems:

*texting girl for a good twenty min*  *no reply for five min*  *panics and checks her snapchat count and it’s rising*  *starts thinkin about how i really screwed up in that last text* now im not hungry for dinner

this isn’t just a straight boy thing

um yes it is

;p

Straight White Boy Problem #496

straightwhiteboyproblems:

watch me do this sick lacrosse trick dude *catches ball behind the back, cradles the ball, and launches the ball at approximately 42.069 mph at bro who is 50 yards away but the ball goes 12 feet over my bro* man why couldnt you catch that your lacrosse stick is the longest on the whole team ugh

Straight White Boy Problem #497

straightwhiteboyproblems:

i fell asleep by the pool once because i was so tired and I eventually started dreaming that I was suspended in air. I was like “this is what michael Jordan feels like when he’s dunking” but then I woke up and one of my bros was holding me by my arms and another dude was holding my legs. They were both laughing. I was like “justin. Trey. Dont do this im not ready” but they dropped my ass in the pool it was sooo cold. Thank GOD my phone wasn’t in my pocket. dad would have killed me

straightwhiteboyproblems:

landorus:

mom did u wash my weed socks u know i cant go out in public without them

Woah

batlock:

So.

Cards Against Humanity.

I’m a big fan. Well, I bought this.

image

It’s great. It hold all of my shit. But it holds something else too.

If you have it, open your box.

image

You see how I started to tear away at the top of the box there?

Do that.

Do it carefully.

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Holy shit.

There’s something in there. What could that be?

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There’s a card.

There is a card literally hidden in the top of the box.

But what card?

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I fucking love these people.

(via asian)

iglovequotes:

Believing in love at first sight cannot be comprehended until you take one look at a stranger’s face and the rest falls into place.

(via samie-wammi)